When my weight loss was becoming obvious to those around me I did receive comments both of concern and others very un-flattering. How I perceived these comments was dependant on my state of mind at the time and ultimately how I was feeling about myself. I have been called a 'cambodian,' been asked if I would require 'caring services.' and been questioned continuously by people I don't even know the first name of, why I was so thin?
Recently I was approached by the relative of a friend who I hadn't seen for many months. He started the conversation with the usual, 'you look better than last time I saw you,' and finished it with, 'are you in remission?'
I left the room in tears. I was shocked not just because of the reminder of how ill I did look but also because he thought I had an illness which sufferers had no control over. Ultimately I always had the control to put a stop to my Anorexia, but my head wouldn't let me. I felt ashamed......
Yesterday whilst shopping I again bumped into someone I hadn't seen for over a year. 'You look well,' she said. I replied with 'thank you,'
I no longer questioned or doubted her statement, I accepted it for the compliment that it was, a fact that I was well and healthy. Her words did not push me to skip dinner or buy some bathroom scales. They gave me a spring in my step and a smile on my face.