Tuesday, 10 July 2012

Week One-Tuesday-Mental Aspects

 There was a time when I could tell you all the bad things about me.  How I was not skinny enough, was ugly, unworthy, undeserving and  stupid. I would look at myself in the mirror and be disgusted by what looked back at me, not all the time but when I was feeling pretty low.
I had never had much confidence, particularly around new people or situations, had horrendous low self esteem and self image all of which I think contributed to issues with depression and eating disorders throughout my adult life.  I am so thankful that I no longer feel this way.
I cannot emphasise how important that we recognise and validate our emotions and feelings.  I know that I have used my eating disorder in the past to feel numb, to stop myself from feeling the hurt of betrayal, the pain of bereavement, the loss of friendship.  I didn't want to accept that what I was feeling was real, but all that happened was it cut deeper into me, making me more ill, more depressed and sending me into a spiral of behaviours that were destroying my life.
I came across a diary that I had written in 2010 and it is painful to read. I wasn't dealing with the emotions I was feeling in a positive way, I wasn't nurturing my body or  my mind.
It has only been since completing the challenges over the past few months that I realised I was still trying to deal with some things I was feeling.  This time I approached them head on and told someone. It helped, just to write it down and press 'send,'  I'm so glad I did.

So how did I stop feeling so bad about myself..........
Discourage Fat talk amongst yourself and your friends.

I ditched the bathroom scales.

Take responsibility and act on it.
Forgive yourself and others before it eats away at you.

Speak up.....


6 comments:

  1. "I cannot emphasise how important that we recognise and validate our emotions and feelings."
    ABSO-FUCKIN-LUTELY!

    Those five ways to make change that you highlighted are so vital and really set people free.

    Just incase you ever doubt it again you are...
    strong, beautiful, vibrant, loving, generous, funny, quirky, deliciously loopy, vital, worthy, fabulously, wonderfully, irreplaceably YOU xxx

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  2. Taking responsibility for my recovery/health/future COMPLETELY shifted my mindset. I spent YEARS swimming in this pool of self-hatred waiting for something else to come save me. Once I realized that I had a choice and a responsibility to save myself, I was able to start implementing some changes. Love this post. =]

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  3. YESYESYESYESYESYES.

    Love the insight, the images and the inspiration x

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  4. Lovely, insightful and inspiring post. I can relate a great deal. Thank-you for sharing this. xo

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  5. such a very very important topic! ; )

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  6. Such a powerful post with all those great affirming, positive quote images. Thank you for reminding me that there is good in all of us, even if we have to take a couple of steps to uncover it!

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