motivation.

Anybody have some I could have? 
Difficult to find motivation at the moment, everything still feels a little surreal, I feel slightly jaded, a little deflated, my sparkle has gone and no amount of glittery bath bombs are giving it back.
I suppose It is understandable, I have dealt with a lot over the past few weeks and no I am not wallowing in self-pity, I am trying to come to terms with my loss, my disappointment with myself and my failings and the return to normality.
I knew that so early on significant stress could set me back but this is not something I could plan for, no writing of lists could stop it happen, no amount of talking will make the pain go away.  To be honest I'm fed up with talking to professionals, it tires me....
I am no different to anyone else who has suffered a loss, I'm sure most people deal with things in similar way.
I need to give myself time, try not to be too hard on myself, accept that I have had a set back but with a set back there is also a way forward, a way forward to a healthy life and a sense of normality.
I cannot see it around the corner, no doubt it will be a road well travelled with hurdles, obstacles in my way to trip me up but at the end.....freedom.